How to be a good lover? Many people wonder what the techniques are to become a professional lover, capable of providing pleasure and making their sexual partner feel comfortable and at ease. There are many problems that can be found when it comes to discovering your partner’s pleasure: reluctance to let go, complexes, self-esteem or confidence problems, excessive control, stress, etc. All this leads to unsatisfactory sex. Next, we will detail what you need to become an exceptional lover and never face these problems again.

The consent

One of the most important and least mentioned aspects is consent. If you want to ensure that you are a good lover in bed, then make sure that you respect your partner’s consent. In order to properly respect your partner’s consent, you must have an in-depth discussion on this topic and listen to their needs and concerns, as well as their wishes.

It is important that you do not interpret gestures as opening without proper explicit confirmation. Many sexual partners will get carried away for the moment, but this does not mean that they are liking what you are doing or enjoying it. In case your sexual partner does not want to do some type of sexual practice, do not insist or use emotional blackmail; these techniques will cause their arousal to drop below zero.


The third commandment for satisfying sex is to find a safe place. This does not mean that your partner is not attracted to unusual places, but it is important to take into account the conditions in which the sexual act takes place to ensure that the partner feels comfortable and trusting. One of the prerequisites for good sex is comfort; therefore, if the place is dirty, too crowded, uncomfortable, your sexual partner will not be able to enjoy sex properly. For example, the house may be a suitable place, but if there are no people in it as roommates.

Learn to listen and communicate

Listening to your partner is essential for trust. If you want to be a good lover, you will have to listen to your partner, either when they tell you about their own insecurities with their body or when they explain that there are certain sexual acts that make them uncomfortable. Whatever it is, learning to actively listen, take their words into account and apply the necessary changes, adapting to the needs of the couple, is a huge plus. Along the same lines, it is also important to know how to communicate. Many people have insecurities about their bodies, and talking about them, downplaying them, complimenting them, and praising their body can help them loosen up and relax during the act.


Patience is a virtue, and it is also important to cultivate it in a sexual relationship. Learning what our partner likes, or dislikes is essential for a healthy sexual relationship, but that takes time and patience since many times learning our partner’s tastes requires practice. Over time, you will learn what makes them vibrate, what makes them uncomfortable, which areas of their body are more erogenous than others, what kind of caresses they prefer, etc. All of this, however, requires that you know how to control your frustration if your partner cannot have an orgasm, help them reach orgasm, even if it requires more effort and patience than you are used to or want to offer, stimulate various parts of their body, and stay tuned to see if they like it or not. Ask them in case you’re not sure. Sex is an exchange, which means mutual give and take.

Innovate in your sex life

Many of the points mentioned become natural for couples over time. The routine is established and what used to work stops working. It is important, therefore, that you arm yourself with toys and accessories that allow you to keep the fun in the sexual act, always with the consent of both partners. However, if the toys are not to your liking, you can always try new techniques: different postures, exciting places, massages, Tantra techniques that help you reconnect and enjoy sex, sexual therapies, etc. There are many ways in which you can revive the passion. Being a good sexual partner also implies knowing how to innovate over time and introduce new ideas and spicy experiences to your sex life.


These are some ways to become an unforgettable lover, put them into practice as soon as possible to see the significant improvement they make in your sex life!